Fucking Pathetic…

Let me start by saying this has absolutely nothing to do with and I am by no means a ben hater. I ain’t no Ben stan, but the dude was going to get paid. If you were surprised or angry by that news that broke a couple of weeks back, you’re probably that douche who buts into someone else’s conversation just to say that “actually soccer is the most popular sport in the world…” – Yo Ethan, go fuck yourself. You’re still the same annoying jerkoff you were in 4th period AP history.

first things first, if you haven’t seen the clip just yet.. I’ll drop it down below. (P.S. this is the OG tweet so go find someone apart of Sixers twitter for the more pathetic replies)

Anyway, for real this Ben Simmons hype is just downright laughable. Like, since when did July and August basketball highlights start to mean anything. I appreciate the brave souls that root for the Sixers that have some common sense who stand behind me and realize that this is fucking embarrassing.

We’re not attacking Ben Simmons either. We’re attacking you fucking losers that are getting a boner over the least exciting sports video that came across anyone’s timeline. The only thing that is more annoying and pointless than NBA superstar videos of them dunking at the local high school outside of Los Angeles are the tweets from Eagles beat writer of them tweeting out a play. No video or anything (I know they’re only allowed a certain amount of footage.)

Honestly, this is a bad look for Philly guys. This will always be a Birds town because football is football, but this city knows it’s hoops. At least I always thought it did. If you are one of those assholes who gets hot and horny for these summer highlight videos, you’ll enjoy some clips from the GOAT of late July workouts in an empty gym being guarded by their 5’9″ trainer.

One final note, the same people that love this clip and think Ben is suddenly gonna average 25 points a game coming exclusively via a jump shot are the same people who really think Nick Foles is a better QB than Carson Wentz. *Metaphorical mic drop*

Ernie El's