Hello you filthy animals. It is I, the King of Mush, The Commissioner of Bad Beats, your boy, Mookie Bets. I miss writing blogs and we chalked NFL talk from The Reverse Mush Podcast, so here I am giving you winners from a shitty WordPress domain. I got shafted in NFL last week with heart breakers coming from the Eagles and Jets, but I’m feeling good this week. I might even get a haircut tomorrow to change up the mojo. I’m going to keep this short, sweet, and simple like an OTPHJ in 6th grade, so lets get right into it.
Eagles vs. Falcons: Eagles -1.5, 2 Units
The real birds started off slow last week in their first half against Washington, but that’s solely attributable to this team not playing together in the preseason. They had to work some kinks out, and then they were able to completely shutdown a miserable R Words team in the 2nd half. The Eagles did let up a garbage time touchdown which cooked the spread like some free-range-organic chicken in the air fryer, but I trust them this week. Specifically, I trust that Matt Ryan can’t score on our defense. The Falcons offense looked abysmal last week, and they only mustered up 50 rushing yards on 14 carries between Ito Smith and Devonta Freeman. If we shutdown their run game like Minnesota did last week, the Eagles will be able to make Atlanta look one dimensional, and therefore make Ryan force the ball to his receivers. We all know how bad that can look. Ride the Eagles spread and ML before it creeps up to -3.
Seattle vs. Pitt: Pitt -4, 1 Unit
Pitt got molly-wopped in Foxborough last week and I like them in a big bounce back spot at home against Seattle this week. The travel in this game is important. A 1PM start time on the East Coast for Seattle basically makes it a morning game for them, so I think they’ll come out flatter than a Jenner pre-surgery. The combination of travel, and the fact that Seattle had to sweat out a 1 point home win against Cinci last week makes me think this is a no-brainer. Ride Pitt spread and throw their ML in some parlays for added value. Big Ben ain’t worried and neither should you.
Patriots vs. Dolphins: Patriots -19, 1 Unit
I’m not overthinking this one. You don’t get rich betting against the Patriots, and you for sure don’t get rich betting on a Miami team that’s tanking like the 2015 76ers. I’ll be fading the Dolphins every week for the rest of the season and so should you. I’ll take a 3 touchdown cover from Brady and the rest of his goons against the worst team to ever be assembled.
Browns vs. Jets: Under 44, 1 Unit
You want mono like Sam Darnold? Take the over. You want to stay healthy and be able to afford health insurance? Take the under. Darnold is out this week which means Trevor Seiman will get the start for the Jets, so I get the feeling they’re going to struggle big time offensively. On the other hand, the Browns only put up 13 against the Titans last week which included 3 interceptions from Baker Mayfield. They still have a lot of things to figure out on the offensive side of the ball (even with their weapons), so I’m calling shit show city in this one. Feed me under 44. Not to mention, the public is 65% on the over, but the line moved from O/U 46 to O/U 44, so we are seeing some sharp money on the under.
Alright, those are my favorite plays on the board. Here’s an additional ML parlay I’ll be riding which pays out close to +200. It includes the Thursday night game so get it in ASAP. I’m throwing 2 units on this piece.
I’ll be posting more plays on Twitter throughout the weekend @TheMookieBets. Happy gambling.
- For 24 Hours I Was Convinced I Had A Dog - July 5, 2021
- The Best Comedy On The Internet Right Now - May 30, 2021
- Spencer Rattler Is About To Dominate College Football - May 23, 2021