We got our dicks kicked in last week. No other way around it. We can hit over 50% all we want but if the locks don’t hit, Mookie is gonna start making me pay just to blog.

In all honesty, the week could have been so much worse. I’m not really sure what to say about Bama because I didn’t watch a single fucking snap from the first half. Instead, I was watching Penn State football bring nothing but shame to a once prestigious university.

No joke, you can make the argument that Penn State not covering -17 to that fucking joke of a coach, Pat Narduzzi was the darkest day in school history. Honestly, can you think of a darker day for Penn State? I cant.

Shoutout Houston as a dog – cover machines as dogs (we aren’t going to acknowledge last night.) We also owe big ups to T. Boone for giving us that ridiculous last-minute cover. We had no business winning that game but we pulled it off.

Week 3 report: 4-3 (57%) -5.4U

Season report: 15-9-1 (62.5%) +6.16U

Picks:

Michigan +3.5 @ Wisconsin (2 Units) Noon

Both the money and the tickets are on Wisconsin. No one is giving Michigan a shot except me. I’m the only one who still believes that this offense is going to turn the corner. The QB sucks, yea I get it. Guess what? quick number game – 95% of college QBs suck. Don’t be fooled by the OT game 2 weeks ago. Let’s go blue.

LSU -24 @ Vanderbilt (4 Units) Noon

The Burrow Heisman hype is real folks. This dude is completing an absurd amount of passes. Even tho he isn’t gonna have to throw the ball much. LSU wins in a blowout. Also, how the hell did Urban Meyer let that kid leave the state of Ohio?

Texas A&M -4 HOME vs. Auburn (2 Units) 3:30

Yea Bo Nix stole the show Labor Day Weekend against Oregon but he did it on a neutral field. I can picture the Sunday paper already “Bo Blows Under the Lights.” who cares that the game is at 3:30, the lights will probably still be on at some point. Home field wins and covers.

Oklahoma State +200 @ Texas (2 Units) 7:30

COWBOYS OUTRIGHT

Clemson -41.5 HOME vs. Charlotte (10 Units) 7:30 LOCK

Who even are the Charlotte 49ers?

UGA -13.5 (B1) HOME vs. Notre Dame (10 Units) 8:00 LOCK

That’s right double locks this week. Fuck Brian Kelly. That dude is such a fucking terrible football coach. Ian Book stinks and he’s gonna shit his face with an SEC defense getting at home early and often. Parlay the locks and let’s get real weird.

Bonus Parlay: +1030 (1 Unit)

UCF -11

UGA -13.5 

Louisville +210

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