We couldn’t be more bach if we tried, fresh off the Bellator 255 press conference we’ve got hot and ready winners for this weekend along with all of my coverage from media day today.

First, thank you to Bellator for inviting The Basement back for some reason. We don’t know why either but it’s a blast and an honor. Without further rambling, enjoy the questions I was able to get off while everyone with a journalism degree was punching air wondering how they and I arrived at the same place in life.

Now, I know what you’re all really here for you greedy little piggies. Winners! And you’ve come to the right place if I do say so myself. Also I was not muted talking to Jack May like an idiot. Find a new slant.

Roger Huerta (24-12-1) +210 v. Chris Gonzalez (5-0)

A veteran of the UFC, ONE, Bellator, and 37 career pro MMA fights, Huerta comes into this one boasting a monumental experience advantage over the 5-0 Gonzalez. While Huerta may be getting a little long in the tooth and has lost 3 in a row, this will be far and away the biggest test of Gonzalez’s young career and he has not fought anyone of the caliber of Heurta’s last 3 losses (Benson Henderson, Patricky Pitbull, and Sydney Outlaw). All that said, I’m going to throw a little 2 unit piece on Huerta and hope we see this play out as a classic “levels” fight.

The Play: 2u Huerta +210

Kana Watanabe (9-0-1) +150 v. Alejandra Lara (9-3)

2 highly touted prospects debuting at 5 and 4 respectively in Bellator’s fancy new rankings (which I will one day vote for) clash in what should be a very fun fight with big implications for the flyweight division. It’s a very interesting stylistic clash between an incredible Judoka in Watanabe and a polished striker in Lara, but in the end I think the + money on Watanabe is too good to pass up. I’ll always understand those who are a little wary of a bet on a “one trick pony” like a Judoka or BJJ specialist but I see Watanabe being able to get the fight to the ground and finish with her ground and pound.

Gimme Watanabe +150 for a unit.

Neiman Gracie (10-1) -105 v. Jason Jackson (13-4)

Another blast of a fight on paper. Neiman is at this point the most talented active fighter in the Gracie family and looks to submit an opponent in Jackson who has only been submitted once in his career, in an exhibition on TUF nonetheless. I’ll say it right now, if Jackson comes out and stuffs the first takedown I am gonna hit the panic button. But, until then, I see Neiman being able to execute those slick BJJ trips he uses and taking the back. I won’t be surprised in the slightest to see Neiman take money on Friday and closing somewhere in the neighborhood of a -130 favorite so I’d lock this one in now if I were you.

Neiman Gracie -105 1.5u

Patricio Pitbull (31-4) v. Emmanuel Sanchez (20-4) +195

This is a tough one. You have Pitbull, Bellator’s #1 P4P fighter against Emmanuel Sanchez in a rematch from 2018. I do think a lot of people are forgetting that that first fight was actually highly competitive and Sanchez really had a few moments, notably a knockdown in the first. The fight finished 48-47 Pitbull, far from a 50-45 washing I think a lot of people remember it as. Both men have made significant improvements since their last meeting and as difficult as it is to pick against Pitbull, it’s just hard to find value at -250. This is far from a sure thing and I might even get real insane and throw Pitbull in a parlay or 2 but straight up, gimme the 2-1 on Sanchez and let’s hope for a banger. I am reserving the right to update this blog and change my mind/maybe bet the under instead.

SPRINKLE Sanchez +195 .5u

And, last but not least, a parlay for all you real sickos out there. I know Usman and Magomed are huge favorites but I am begging and pleading with you; do not fade them. They are priced where they are for a reason and should be confidently added as parlay pieces to basically anything you are betting this week. Get weird with it, fuck it. I am also on the fence about including Pitbull because of the Sanchez sprinkle but if you want to do that I certainly wouldn’t advise against it

The Official Bookie Busters Bellator Parlay:

Magomed Magomedov, Usman Nurmagomedov, Mandel Nallo, and Roman Faraldo

-105 without Pitbull, +173 with.

Enjoy the fights Friday night on Youtube and/or Showtime you goblins and ghouls, and tune into twitch.tv/sexualjumanji Friday for some live coverage of the prelims from me and the man himself.